bicara dari hati

Assalamualaikum and good evening~ it's definitely been a while since i post in this blog. in my defense, i would say the reason is because i am in my final year, and i have to finish my action research (AR) in order to graduate. therefore, since i managed to post this meant... i have now completed my degree studies and is waiting for my interview. since the interview date is not yet revealed, for now, i filled my time by working as an assistant at a small bookshop. it was quite challenging tho there would be some free time where i sit and feel sleepy coz nobody is coming into the shop. however, in the spirit of gaining new knowledge, i learnt to: 1. balance the account (tho the owner did it most of the time) 2. count the stocks (very important - for the account) 3. make sure there's no 'lifting' of things (it happened, the horror of it) 4. opening and closing the shop. 5. restocking the sales item well, i think that's the scope of my work. you would...

to be honest, there's so much i wanna write or share, it's all in my head, the stories, the tears, the laughter, the smiles cumanya, tgh sibuk (cliche, i know) and malas (pun cliche) therefore, i would put this blog in hiatus? or probably, i'll write once a day. on anything? please tell me... =______='

Hi, it's Mother's day! this year, i am not at home, so i didn't do or plan anything special for ibu. Probably because for me, everyday is mother's or father's or siblings' day. So, everyday is a special day. Yeah, yeah, i know, cliche. But it is true. Plus, i wouldn't be able to say anything coz i would be to choke up and ended up crying, which is what i hate. So, yeah. Growing up, i spent 5 years at a boarding school, Johor. This made me felt closer to friends rather than my own family because i spent more time there than at my own house. Despite that, we still remained a close knitted family. However, living at a boarding school taught me a lot. One of them is to appreciate my family. When i was 5-12 years old, i was actually (still is) a rebellious child. When i felt slighted, wronged or insulted, i would argue about it till i felt satisfied. I can and would argue with older people, using my loud voice, which is considered rude in Malay custom. And in M...

Ya Allah, it's been soo long since i've written anything here.. I am sorry to my readers (if there is any) for not updating, a lot had been happening, and each was important to say the least. plus, laziness is always there, lurking. So yeah, laziness + things / tasks to do = abandoned blog. It's nearing to the mark of 3 months, meaning our practicum is nearing the end. Proposal had been handed in, had been approved. Alhamdulillah... The school is having their sports day, thus we (me n practicum partner) entering classes to relief the teachers. Was appointed to handle the performance. Luckily, partner is a dancer, so she did the choreograph, i did the teaching. Hahaha, good partnership, right? ;P Could not wait for holidays. Nowadays, free time is so precious, we need to grab whenever we can. Even while we are resting (sleeping), the mind is still churning around, thinking abour observation marks, the research, lesson plans and whatnots. No wonder they say teachers...

I know, I know,i haven't update this blog for quite a long time.. I have soo many things i wanted to write but i am just too lazy to write. Yes, the key word here is LAZY. hahahaha~ Okay, yesterday i had to buy a new printer. My old faithful EPSON TX110 had finally exhausted itself. No matter what i did, he refused to print anything, which meant I either had to go home and exchanged it with another spare printer we had at home, also from the same brand and type. However, the spare printer wasn't feeling so well, meant either I used the home printer (Brothers DCP-J315W) or buy a new one. I wanted to just use the Brothers but Ayah and Ibu had to use the printer too. Thus, the new printer. Ayah told me to buy the same printer (Brothers) because obviously it is quicker to print and to date, hasn't done any funny things. Unfortunately, when I went to Low Yatt with Mr.I and Nash (the expert), the price was astounding (Rm500 + additional RM100 for refillable catridge). I think Ay...

today, i got a notice from HEP (Office of Student's Affair) about my car's lacking of sticker. or rather the college's sticker.  ok, it's not like i don't want to get the sticker, i don't have one of the requirements. you see, my car is the second hand car and i haven't finished paying it yet. therefore, the car's original grant is with the bank and the car's grant copy is with the owner.  meaning i couldn't get the sticker. so, can you see the complications?  now, i have to pay rm30 becoz of the fine. and also request for the sticker without the grant as it's at johor. or i will walk. it's fine by me. so, i'll use the car for the use outside the college.  URGH!! why can't they just give it to use without the grant?  not all of us can buy the car. so we use 2nd hand one.  URGHHH!!! this won't even come close to what i am feeling right now

today is the most harrowing day for me.. why?  because my hedgehog's foot was injured. i had noticed that Kayu Manis hasn't been active for 2 nights, so, naturally, i am worried because hedgehogs are nocturnal. i opened her cage, and pulled the D.I.Y pouch made from a discarded hijab. what i hadn't anticipated was that when i pulled the pouch,  kayu manis made a very, very, very distressing sound. i was shocked because i never heard she made those sound other than the usual huffing and puffing sound.  so, i checked her.  it seemed that her left foot had tangled with the pouch's strings and it was red and looked bruised.  i was in panic.  the first thing i did was to cut free the pouch,  however since kayu manis curled into a ball, it was difficult to free her leg. so, i had to cut the majority of the pouch.  next, i put her in a pail with some water. you see, kayu manis didn't like water much,  so she would ...

i think this year started with disbelieving tweets and fb posts. why?  i guessed because all of us, TESLIANS, couldn't believed that we are finally in our FINAL year.  yes, for the past 4 years, all, or rather me, decided o go through the year semesters by semesters. and each semester was marked with the semester's exam.  and each time, waiting for the result will make us nevous. however, as much as we are happy that we are finally in our final year, the apprehension comes in waves, because we are: 1. having our 3 month practicum this time, i am grateful to Allah, becoz my wish to go to the same phase 2 school was granted. therefore, i will meet my kids, again.. though with different partner. sine it's 3 month, I really hope that everything will works well. 2. new sv yes, this time, no Mdm Irene @ Mdm Ninja.. She was promoted to another college, so I will hv new supervisor. keeping my finger-crossed that i will hv kind supervisor. 3. starting ou...

Christmas this year was marked by atiq's wedding.  she's my primary school friend and also my colleague mate, so, it can be considered as special although some of my primary school friends had wed long before her.  but it's special because she's one of my close friends and like me, she's only 22 years old.  which is considered too early for me.. andd she married her own classmates, uciss!! when i knew, i teased her. a lot.  because i used to match her with uciss but they said 'noooooo!!' look, my words did come true.  hahahahaha~ ah well, no more atiq in our midst for raya convoy, no more hanging out at the night marker, or just in front of our house to gossip or whatnot.  she's a married friend and she has to prioritize well.. however, this raised on questions inside me.. 1. why did she decided to marry early? 2. is she really prepared to become a wife, a daughter in law, a student and probably a mother? 3. will she be...

in Malay, kayu manis means cinnamon stick. however, in my family, kayu manis is the name of our 2-month-old African Pygmy hedgehog. yes, her name is kayu manis @ cinnamon stick. hahaha ;P it's probably because she's a salt and peper with a hint of brown.  so, the first name that comes in mind is kayu manis.  ayah bought her from MAHA with Nani. ( Malaysian Agriculture, Horticulture & Agrotourism Show) MAHA is a place where people from all over Malaysia comes to promote their business and others to come, see and buy things.  so this is where ayah bought her. they even bought the complete set: the cage, the food, the water bottle and the bedding. although, only after i explained it they understood that hedgehog is not suitable with wood bedding,  so i had to buy cat's paper bedding. i think they were influenced from Mr. I's hedgehog, Sonic. well, once or twice i had to bring and take care of Sonic during the holidays.. becaus...

from our own class n batch!! wooooo~  bcoz this is the first one,  everyone decided to go. hahaha~ but in the end, few couldn't make it. but it's ok! coz we had fun!! though actually we knew about the marriage for 3 years,  the ceremony was only done today.  i guess they decided to wait till everything stabilized.  so, congratulations to both Syahmi and Syahirah. may Allah bless your marriage till jannah.  aminnnn~ hmmm, i wonder who next?  hahaha~~ btw, we started the journey at 8.40 am (i think) arrived at temerloh around 10. ++a.m, we went to visit Mohan for deepavali. my car arrived first, followed yus' and then shakir's.  mind you, there were 13 of us. haha~  but, mohan's mom cooked a very nice mee hoon n served tea n milk tea to us, so that's bfast for us. hahhaa~ so, thank you mohan n family for the bfast~ then around 12.00, we took some pictures n then started journey to majlis syahmi...

That is a biggggg fattttt lieeeeee Seriously people, think well before you ever choose to be a teacher. Nooopeeeeee, If you have the passion, and the patience, Then go for it. But I would say 40% passion and 60% of patience are required. No kidding people. I love the kids, I seriously do BUTTTT they can drive you up the wallll!!!! When I first entered the system, I seriously thought I would be teaching the secondary school. Little did I know that I was actually entering the primary school programme. OH WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY???? T_T Never mind, I’ll strive and do better. One year and I’ll be a teacher!! Well, that’s a nice thought. Maybe. Watch out kids, I am no ordinary miss. Me being the oldest of 6 has given me enough time to practice my voice projection and my glare. Beware or you’ll suffer!!! muahahahahahaha* evil laugh 

well, i know i haven't write in such a long time, trust me,  i have thousand things i wanna write about, it's juz that i am tooo lazy. hahaha~ fyi, i am doing my phase 2 practicum in a school at Setapak.  it had been 4 weeks, but like i said, wayyyy toooo lazyyyy to write,  so sorryyyy~ i wanna share about this one boy, he's 10 years old, which in Malaysian education system would meant year 4 @ grade 4, he is very cute but very cheeky tooo. ok, i think this "freaky occurrences" started during a raya celebration at this school, he asked me for selfies so many times, so, i accommodated him just to avoid from him bugging me,  but nowadays,  whenever he comes into the staffroom, he would do a detour to my table,  said "Miss ni cutelah" @ "Miss is cutelah",  then continue his way to the destination. and i was like "whateheck is the problem with this boy? =_=" then, when he saw my practicum partner, ...

alright,  let's discuss.  opposites attracts, but opposites attacks too.  so, let see, we are way too stubborn to let each other go, but we are way too harsh on each other too.  i wouldn't want you to change, and i don't want to change.  all i want is,  to listen when i talk, talk when i am silent, don't ask when i am silent, i will tell you about it later.  just ignore my mutterings cause mutterings is how i organize my thoughts plus, you wouldn't want to know what i mutters.  (well, probably because it can be about killing other people or may also be about killing you) when you advises me,  please remember that i may act like i won't listen to it or grumbles a lot,  but actually i did and sometimes i will still follow it.  when i make a decision based on your advices, don't ask me about it again, that makes me mad.  don't bring up past arguments, i hate past arguments please scold me gen...

Alhamdulillah,  today's paper marked the end of the daunting semester 5!!  Alhamdulillah, praise to Allah. it's amazing when you started the year off with worries about practicum and what not,  but today,  you juz realized that you had survived everything Allah, life and campus had given to you.  oh wow,  this meant i only have another 3 semester left.  1 year and a half.  wow.. that's... amazing and also scary.. how time flies.  anyway,  right now, i want to enjoy the sleep that i am deprived of..  daa~~ =)

due to the changing weather in one day: e.g: morning is sunny, but evening is rainy i caught the complete set of flu: sore throat, cough, fever n flu. yep, the complete set. now, let it be known, that i rarely get sick, erm, not trying to brag, but it is just a gift Allah give to me. however, i am more prone to small cuts or bruise. but i guess these harsh weathers must have caught up with me. never mind, i remembered a saying that "being sick is a kifarah for your sins and shows that Allah remember you." meaning that me being sick will clear my small sins and that it is the way for Allah to tell me that i am still under the blessing. well, i am ok with being sick, juz wasn't happy with the melancholy feeling that comes with it. dunno why, but yesterday night, i cried on the phone, calling my mom, saying i wanted to go home. well, ibu being ibu, had to pujuk me, saying that i had class, therefore, wait till i am a bit ok.  i can't drive n ayah defi...

wow, how long i haven't post here? ntah, even i am not sure myself. there's plethora of things in my head, for me to write in this blog, but trying to find the words and time is too time consuming. hahaha, no, that's a lie. i was so lazyyyy, that i choose to form the words only in my head. heee XD i am so sorry~ i promise, i will do my best to write again~ so, please.. don't stop reading this =)

is Tuesday, april 8th, 2014. 2nd day of the 2nd week of practicum week. at the moment, i am in the staffroom, relaxing for a while,  with a feeling that my throat is sore after trying to do a sketsa practice.  just got to know yesterday,  meaning only 2 days of practice.  lucky me,  got 4 bestari which is my own practicum class.  at 11. 50 till 12.50,  gotta move to 2 cemerlang,  for 1 h relief class.  hoping they would cooperate.  hmmm, what should i play?  maybe 'i spy'.  the reality set in yesterday, at how good my pupils of 4 bestari fooled the lecturer by behaving well.  had a very hard time controlling them,  making me raised my voice over few times =.='.  plus the sleepless night,  trying to create a cohesive and achievable lesson plan.  but yeah,  this is time to practice.  never mind, i'll fight as long as i can.  ohhh, now i...

wohoooo~ happy birthday to Mr. I~ 22nd kan? no use turning the numbers around~ it will still be 22~ hahahaha~ so, juz accept it will ya, you are OLD , therefore try to accept it when people always mistaken you as the older one, not me~ hehehe~ this year, may Allah continue to bless you, in everything you do, everywhere you are, everyday of your life~  ich liebe dich =)

just now i received a call from ayah, saying that adik's house was ransacked. the thief (thieves) searched everywhere in the house, the closets, cupboards and the drawers. she and her housemates lost quite a lot of valuables.. laptops, moneys, ATM cards, anything they deemed valuable, as for adik,  she lost her ATM card (malaysian use), IC, phone, laptop we, the family doen't mind much for the materials taken,  but we are concerned about the I.C, without the I.C, adik couldn't go and do the Umrah.. Ya Allah,  this is truly a trying time for us.. but we are not whining or feels dejected, we know you are giving us this tests to see if we can pass it  before we are going to be the visitors of the Holy land, but Allah,  please give us strength to pass this test..  aminn...